I got the chance to met Charlie Laine while at a convention here in San Francisco recently.

And, oh my god she’s hotter in person. Rarely do chicks give me insta-boner, but Charlie managed to accomplish that feat.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around her hotness. I’ll continue to beat to her till I do.

I know what you’re asking yourself, “Did you hit on her? Did you fuck her?”

I’m sorry… I can’t even look at you guys right now… I hate myself.

`

You know how much I love Daisy Marie?

I love her so much I want to dip my chips in her juicy queso.

Let’s do another one…
I love her so much I want to cover Daisy’s chicken enchilada with my sour cream sauce.

Wait… one more!
I love her so much… I want to bury my camarones all up in her a la diabla… ALL UP IN IT!

Aye dios mother fucking Mio, Daisy Marie…

Not that I didn’t love the flat chested Micah Moore, because there’s something to be said about a chick with little tatty’s, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love the fake tattyed (grammatically correct) Micah a bit more.

You might remember a time when Micah looked like THIS.

That’s fine, I still beat off like a like 13 year old how just got his hands on his grandpa’s Playboys to her.

But now? Well, not I’m beating off to her like a 13 year old who looked out his window and saw Ms. Rachel taking a shower next door.

What the fuck am I talking about? Just enjoy… and fine more of Micah at Innocent High.

The first time I saw Violet Erotica, I had the same reaction as the Double Rainbow guy. I was shocked, excited, broke down in tears, questioned life, beat off like no tomorrow and finally weeping while beating.

Life rules.

Right, back to Violet. You can catch her doing dirty things on webcam over at OnHerCam, or head over to her site VioletErotica.com.

And I like it. Cody Lane is just filthy, but isn’t that what you want in a fuck?

She’s not the most fit girl, and really, she’s not the hottest chick you’ve ever seen.
But, when she starts fingerbanging herself it’s like when the ugly duckling becomes a swan.

Well, no, it’s nothing like that. It’s more like when the thick, kinda hot chick becomes a whore, which, in hindsight, isn’t that better?

I think so.

Plus, she sucks dick like a fuckin’ champ.

Check out MadThumbs for more fuckin’.

We all know how much I love porn and zombies together.

You know what I love even moooore? Asians!!

So when you combine Asians, Tattys and zombies I’m in boner overload.

Needless to say, I’m more excited about The Big Tits Zombie 3D than I was about Avatar.

And, The Big Tits Zombie 3D is probably not even actually in 3D.

Sushi Zombie!

Tell me you know who Bryci is. Seriously, just tell me. No? Well, what the fuck is wrong with you? Why do you hate hot naked chicks? I don’t get it.

While most chicks swim in the kiddie level at the pool, Bryci is diving poon deep off the high dive. (That means she’s fucking crazy hot, by the way.)

For reasons unknown to me, I get really excited when I pull it to Bryci. It’s like my dick is attending a concert for the first time. There’s buying the ticket, the anticipation, the event, then the encore (you can’t just beat once to Bryci, you know).

Now what are you waiting for, check out Bryci’s amazing, naked body and get to whacking.

(For an extra treat – Beat here)

Vikki Mother Fucking Blows.

Vikki Blows is the wind beneath my wings. She’s the light at end of my tunnel. She’s the nipple at the end of my tit.

If the internet is beer, then Vikki Blows is a shot of whiskey. She just makes everything better.

Vikki takes her tittays out a lot, and this, my friends is a very good thing. They’re like the pocket watch that hypnotists use. They’ll put you in a trance where all you can is beat off. This is the best trance ever.

God, I love this girl!

Get mesmerized below!

There’s jizz in your hands right now… I KNOW IT!!

Face down, ass up… that is the way I like to fuck. 2 Live Crew was so right, but not as right as Face Down Ass Up University.

Pretty novel concept, really. Just get a bunch of smokin’ hot co-eds to get naked in their dorm rooms.

Fuck, I miss college so much. This was pretty much every day for me at the Baptist college I attended. Wait…

Let’s all enroll in FDAU University!

I know how much you bustas love areolas, so I thought I’d draw your attention to in the incomparable, Havana Ginger.

I can’t help but to get boners to this sexy latina and her DD tits. I bet her areolas taste like Taco Bell Mexican Pizzas. MMmmmm… Mexican Pizza.

Have fun beating to these fun bags!

Also check out Susie Sparks giant areolas HERE!