I’ve been seeing Ashley Bulgari show up every now and again for about a year, and each time I think, “Man, I fucking love this chick.”

I never did anything beyond that, until today. I decided to take action on the super hot Ashley Bulgari and share her with you guys. It’s crazy how nice I am.

Turns out, she’s a Czech girl, which oddly enough has been my go to lately. I never knew I had a thing for Czech girls. Well, I do. And now I need to find a reason to visit. Should we start a porn conference over there or what?

Check out more of Ashely here, here and here.

No, seriously. Mary Carey is selling her beloved implants on Ebay. It’s not a hoax. The current bid is $12,526.33! If you won, you could feel her up anytime you wanted.

Bidding ends on December 13th, folks. Go for it!

Mary recently said “Now that I’m sober, I wanted a new physical state to go along with my new mental state….I thought the auction would be a great way to spread some holiday cheer and to make sure someone out there has a Mary Mary Christmas.”

I’ve had a crush on Mary Carey for hella long. Ever since she mistook me for a plumper pornstar at the kick off party for Could You Be a Pornstar in Vegas. *sigh*