What the fucking fuck?! It’s like every day I wake up and discover a new, ridiculously hot solo girl.

Trust me, I would rather post zombies fucking, or discuss the a new Porn Parody, but they just won’t let me.

Enter Autumn Riley. Enter Boner.

Autumn Riley reminds me of that stripper that always gets away. You know what I’m talking about. You see her on stage, and give her all your money, then next thing you know she’s dancing on some fat tard. Alright, you can be patient, right? So, you decide to get a dance, which sucks really badly. You look over, because you’re finally going to get a dance from the hottest girl, and you’re even thinking, “I could blow $500 in VIP,” and she’s fucking gone. Gone. Where did she even go? Ugh… well, I guess it’s back to the fat tard. At least she gives good head, right?

I know that the title of this post may not mean much… I mean, there are lots of things I want to put my penis in.

Sometimes I see a one of those Jell-o cups and think, “I sort of want to put my penis in you, Jell-O cup.”

I’m not going to confirm whether or I do it, but I definitely think about it.

Aspen Parker is like a giant sized Jell-o cup. Primed and ready for my penis to be in her.

This is what I like best about Aspen Parker.

Check out more HERE and HERE

This morning I was beating off to one of the hottest teens I’ve ever seen. I decided I should go further, and find more of this chick. So, I google, FTV Ileana… which lead me to Amia Miley > Amia Moretti > Amea Moretti > Amaia Moretti.

All them ridiculously hot, but none of them as young and hot as FTV Ileana. I’d like to think she disappeared after what I’ve posted. Let’s do that.

Since I’m feeling randy this morning, I thought I’d give you guys a motherload, plus a video of her getting fuuuuuucked.

Why? Because this chick has one of the greatest asses ever, she’s sex and I want to put my penis inside of her.

You’re fucking welcome.

(I really need to get back to abnormal shit)

Alright… let’s just get out the obvious… HOLY FUCKING SHIT LITTLE CAPRICE IS FUUUUUCKING.

Stand back, people, I’m about to coat the walls with my jizz. I’m shocked she’s not driving more traffic to the site, to be honest. Well, fuck y’all, cause she’s hot as a mo’fo’.

On the other hand, we have this skinny punk wannabe giving her the business. Oh man, what the hell is going on here?
Luckily, I was able to overcome the glaring weakness, and beat my dick like a stepchild.

I know, posting Met Art girls is boring and dumb, but I literally cannot stop beating to this chick. I don’t know what it is about Loreen A that drives my dick so crazy, but damn she’s hot.

My dick is like a zombie when I see Loreen A. It knows what it wants, it will do anything to get it, and the only way to stop it is to cut of its head.

I seriously want to mail order the shit out of Loreen A.

I don’t know what it is about amateur’s that I love so much. Maybe it’s that I know there hasn’t been a 15″ dick in everyone of her holes. Because they haven’t meet me… WHUUUUUT (right… moving on…)

And, I love young, hot college chicks naked. Let’s be honest, who doesn’t?

Also, GF Revenge has given me a new fetish, naked chicks wearing baseball caps. I had no idea how effin’ hot that is.

So, what is GFRevenge? Well, you can get paid for submitting photos or videos of your ex girlfriend. Get paid $100 for a photo or a $1,000 for a video?

Wait, you don’t have photos of your ex’s? Then beat off to other dude’s throwaways!

What happened to Linsey Dawn McKenzie after she had a breast reduction (36HH down to a 36DD)? I miss that foxy British babe. I want new photos, videos, lesbian trysts, and blog posts from her. Natural breasts like Linsey’s will never be forgotten. …but she meant so much more to me than just squishy pillows.

Here’s a photo to jugg jog your mamory memory…

Crave more of Linsey? Me, too! I want at least one site update from her. I need it. Baby, please give me just a little current content…pleaaaseeeeeeeeeeeeee Your fans are sad. In the meantime, here are some older videos of her sweet fucking body that you can see for free.

Bonus: Watch this hardcore video of Ms. McKenzie here.

I love seeing young girls with confidence taking nude photos in front of their mirror. So cute!

I’m over seeing nude pornstars. Their too fake and used up looking. Give me a real girl any day who’s proud of what they’ve got. I don’t care what your fucking bathroom looks like. Dance for me, girl. Smile at yourself in the mirror and take a nude photo cause you know I want to see it.

If you enjoy self shot amateur porn, check out these free pic galleries:

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20.

The lovely Dita Von Teese was on Last Call with Carson Daly doing what she does best. Getting Naked.

See the whole video here.

Many call Dita the “Queen of Burlesque”. She has an unforgettable look that lends itself well to glamour and fetish photography. Beyond her image, you’ll see a confidence and control that is rare to find in erotica. I suppose it’s only natural that she’d be confident after a decade on stage. Her faux vintage fetish videos are what I love the most. ….or her spreads in Playboy magazine.

Intrigued? I’ve got some other free Dita videos for you to watch: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. 10.

That’s right, folks. I’d like to take a brief moment to review some of the most awesome (the worst, really) possible sex. You know sometimes the best porn is the type you can pass around to your friends and scream “eww” over. If you can add to our list, please do so in the comments section. You don’t have to admit that you did it, as you’re amongst friends here. I’ll add video examples, for your viewing pleasure.

Scary Rad Sex (in no mother fucking order)…

1. Messy Anal and Sharting

2. Tampon Surprise

3. Oops You Have a Dick Too

4. Sharp Teeth on Dick

5. Oops I Got Horny & Fucked a Rubber Chicken

6. Oops I found Jesus after this Hardcore Scene

7. Oh snap, you put our sex tape on the internet!

8. Eating Your Own Jizz is Kinda Nasty

9. Cum Shot in Eye aka Pink Eye

10. Pornstar Bloopers During Shoot aka Outtakes

11. Drunk Chicks Barfing During Sex

12. Homeless People Sex