I know that the title of this post may not mean much… I mean, there are lots of things I want to put my penis in.

Sometimes I see a one of those Jell-o cups and think, “I sort of want to put my penis in you, Jell-O cup.”

I’m not going to confirm whether or I do it, but I definitely think about it.

Aspen Parker is like a giant sized Jell-o cup. Primed and ready for my penis to be in her.

This is what I like best about Aspen Parker.

Check out more HERE and HERE

This morning I was beating off to one of the hottest teens I’ve ever seen. I decided I should go further, and find more of this chick. So, I google, FTV Ileana… which lead me to Amia Miley > Amia Moretti > Amea Moretti > Amaia Moretti.

All them ridiculously hot, but none of them as young and hot as FTV Ileana. I’d like to think she disappeared after what I’ve posted. Let’s do that.

Since I’m feeling randy this morning, I thought I’d give you guys a motherload, plus a video of her getting fuuuuuucked.

Why? Because this chick has one of the greatest asses ever, she’s sex and I want to put my penis inside of her.

You’re fucking welcome.

(I really need to get back to abnormal shit)

Corin Riggs is fucking hot. One problem, I don’t know what her tattys look like. One solution, show me your tatty’s Corin Riggs.

Any chick that can give me a raging boner while wearing a skirt and top deserves to have her boobies be seen (that didn’t make sense, did it?).

Look at them, though! They look so fucking tasty. Stop teasing us Corin, and unleash the beasts!

I want to titty fuck you!!

But, until then, I”ll just jerk off to your cleavage. How fun :\

Vikki Mother Fucking Blows.

Vikki Blows is the wind beneath my wings. She’s the light at end of my tunnel. She’s the nipple at the end of my tit.

If the internet is beer, then Vikki Blows is a shot of whiskey. She just makes everything better.

Vikki takes her tittays out a lot, and this, my friends is a very good thing. They’re like the pocket watch that hypnotists use. They’ll put you in a trance where all you can is beat off. This is the best trance ever.

God, I love this girl!

Get mesmerized below!

There’s jizz in your hands right now… I KNOW IT!!

As I mentioned, while in Phoenix, Talia Shepard floored me every time I saw her. Never a shy person, I couldn’t even bring myself to say hello, you are awesome.

So who is that amazing chick, that was also a Twisty’s Treat of the Month?

Well, she’s from Texas, lives in Arizona has some real/amazing tattys and she sure plays a mean dodgeball.

Enjoy this amazing chick, cause I know I do.

Check out some galleries:

Talia Pink Bra

Talia White Dress

Talia Fucking Hot Black Dress

Talia Bikini

And check out her new site TaliaShepard.com and her twitter @taliashepard

Pornzio.com is back!

I know what you’re saying, “Holy shit, Pornzio, what the hell are you doing back? I’ve all but forgotten about you.”

It’s purely selfish, I assure you. And it’s mainly to promote Pornzio.com/m, the first mobile only adult search engine. It’s actually pretty sweet, so check it out and beat to the results when you have a chance (like after you’ve pooped… wait… if a “blumpkin” is getting head while you’re shitting, what’s the term for jerkin’ while you’re pooping? Jumpkin?)

Of course, we won’t just talk about ourselves here, no no… Once I hit publish, we’ll start writing about all the things that make a porn blog great (aka naked people).

Happy to have you back.

PS… Eva’s vagina is pretty… I’d like to go camping there.

God damn it, I love every ounce of that woman’s body. Her site is mostly softcore, focusing on her soft squishy pillows. Watch her run up and down stairs until her boobs fall out of her top. Enjoy her licking her own breasts without any neck strain. See her take 2 scrumptious minutes lifting her heavy breasts out of her bra cups. It’s just too much for me to handle. I’m so obsessed with curvy women.

Dude. Her breasts weigh over 16 pounds (that’s a double H cup, folks)!!!

I’m over seeing nude pornstars. Their too fake and used up looking. Give me a real girl any day who’s proud of what they’ve got. I don’t care what your fucking bathroom looks like. Dance for me, girl. Smile at yourself in the mirror and take a nude photo cause you know I want to see it.

If you enjoy self shot amateur porn, check out these free pic galleries:

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20.

Where to start? Eve has been around for a little while, and yet I still can’t stop looking at her. She’s so hot it makes my balls hurt. Seriously, they hurt. I may need to go and get this looked at. It’s not normal, is it? Well, regardless, it’s worth it, because Eve is amazing. She’s a fucking hot Hungarian, who loves to be naked. Isn’t that what we all want: hot, naked Hungarians? Honestly, Eve Angel is arguably the first Hungarian I have ever seen, but if this is a sign of the women there, then I’m moving to Hungry. Think of the limitless amount of Hungry jokes I could use. Eve started fucking at about 17, and we in America had to wait one more year before we could watch it. My favorite thing about Eve is that while she enjoys modeling right now, she aspires to be an archaeologist (note, it’s spelled wrong in the bio:). Cute isn’t it? Dream on Eve, but for right now we’re going to go ahead and excavate your vag. For your viewing pleasure, here’s a mecca of Eve galleries. Just a warning, there may be pop-ups, and there may be spam. I’m sorry, but I didn’t go through them all. Suffice it say, after the second gallery I was finished. Also, for a special treat, and because she’s my favorite, here’s her first screen test. Her pleasure-love sounds may resemble a goat being slaughtered, but seriously, who doesn’t love that?

Natalie Sparks is hot. Let’s say Jennifer Garner and I had a baby, it would look like Natalie Sparks. I’m not even sure what that means, but it’s true. I first came across Natalie I was, well, masturbating, and her big brown eyes were all I needed. She has big, precious boobies and that’s important. I like outfits on my ladies, and Natalie has many. She’s a 20-year-old hottie, that is fairly new to the naked game. She looks to have a D cup, but I would need to touch them to be sure. I would probably use Natalie’s boobies as punching bags, and she’d like it. Chicks dig that shit, right? She has some webcam shows where she does things like fingerbang herself. I love some watching chicks fingerbang themselves. I like it almost as much as I like saying fingerbang. But wait… there’s more. Natalie has a special little sister, Nicole Sparks. OK, so I am not positive they are sisters, but they are both hot and they have the same last name. So, check them out, and just beat it. Oh… here’s their myspace, so you know.. Natalie and Nicole. Thank God for myspace!