Monday 03.03.08
Do you like bisexual amateurs? I talk about Tatum Reed a lot on Pornzio because she’s artsy, smart, runs her own site, enjoys listening to electroclash while she’s rimming girls, AND is super sexy. Clearly, I’m mildly obsessed with her va-jay-jay.
She sent me another video today of a hot brunette she met in LA while she was walking her dog. Click here to download this lesbian amateur video.
Read more on Tatum Reed on wikipedia.
Thursday 08.16.07
Did anyone watch So You Think You Can Dance last night? Lacey and Danny were learning a new Viennese Waltz routine. In one section, she’s supposed to slide underneath him and duck her head. Lacey was almost all the way through, and her head knocked up (hard) and hit his junk. Lacey started giggling and said, ”My head hit Danny’s goodies!” Whatever. I know at least 20 gay men who would have loved to be in her position. P’okay!
Wednesday 08.01.07
That’s right, folks. I’d like to take a brief moment to review some of the most awesome (the worst, really) possible sex. You know sometimes the best porn is the type you can pass around to your friends and scream “eww” over. If you can add to our list, please do so in the comments section. You don’t have to admit that you did it, as you’re amongst friends here. I’ll add video examples, for your viewing pleasure.
Scary Rad Sex (in no mother fucking order)…
1. Messy Anal and Sharting
2. Tampon Surprise
3. Oops You Have a Dick Too
4. Sharp Teeth on Dick
5. Oops I Got Horny & Fucked a Rubber Chicken
6. Oops I found Jesus after this Hardcore Scene
7. Oh snap, you put our sex tape on the internet!
8. Eating Your Own Jizz is Kinda Nasty
9. Cum Shot in Eye aka Pink Eye
10. Pornstar Bloopers During Shoot aka Outtakes 
11. Drunk Chicks Barfing During Sex
12. Homeless People Sex
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kink,
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photos,
reality,
scary,
slut,
sport fuck,
squirt,
swamp,
things in pussy,
ugly,
video,
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Wednesday 06.06.07
Being a hot celebrity is not all it’s cracked up to be. Money, fame, personal trainers, fans, gift bags, VIP everything… Lindsay works hard for the money, but you can tell she’s still kinda emo. When she’s trippin ballz at her luxury apt, she’s still so alone. [awww]
Whatever… she makes emo look sexy!
So are Lindsay Lohan and Vanessa Minnillo lesbo cutters or what?
Oh, and more sexy emo pics of Lohan…
You know that this photo series probably has an all-nude lesbo side that hasn’t leaked yet. One can only hope that we’ll get a chance to see those, too.
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Tuesday 05.15.07
I’m sure our friends at Hustler are going to toast with Campari tonight. lol In light of Jerry Falwell’s death today, let’s all jerk off to Hustler videos tonight. Ready? Ok. Go.
I’ll give you some free videos that are Larry Flynt approved. Check out this, this, this, and this to start. You can thank your favorite lesbian later. xoxo
Wednesday 05.09.07
When I think of Paris in jail, I get so sad. …until I think of her playing “bitch sub” to some butch dyke in jail. Glee! Then I get totally stoked about a possible lesbo jail sex tape. I digress…
If you are really worried about Paris going to jail, sign this petition asap. It reads, “This petition is to ask Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon Paris Hilton for her mistake. Please allow her to her return to her career and life. Everyone makes mistakes. She didn’t hurt or kill anyone, and she has learned her lesson. She is sincere, apologetic, and full of regret for her actions as she explained tearfully to the Judge handling her case in court yesterday. She is distraught and understandably afraid.” LA prosecutors are recommending that Paris Hilton serve a whopping 45 days in jail. Ouch.
Paris Hilton’s attorney, Richard Hutton, issued this statement on her behalf:
“After reading the media’s coverage of my court hearing, I feel the need to correct what I believe are misperceptions about me. I absolutely realize how serious driving under the influence is. I could not live with myself if anyone was injured or killed while I was driving while impaired. Clearly, no one should — no matter how slightly.
I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation.
No one is above the law. I surely am not. I do not expect to be treated better than anyone else who violated probation. However, my hope is that I will not be treated worse.”
Fuck it. I signed the petition. Need a more tangible reason to keep Paris free?
Live the dream, Paris!!!
Monday 03.26.07
Yes, this is me fingering my coffee…
If you’re a caffeine addict, no orgasm can top that deep exhale after your first taste of coffee in the morning. You can’t fake it. It can’t be denied. Yes, my friends–I’m talking about coffee porn. Studies show that coffee actually taps into the female sex drive. It’s true. It’s sad that I haven’t hooked up more in coffee house bathrooms, really. I’d be into that.
Ladies, are you with me? The folks at esspressoporn.com are. Their blog illustrates the devine connection between espresso drips and cum shots. Super sexy, if you ask me. Here’s another money shot visual…
Check out coffee porn on flickr, and this silly video montage of coffee, Jenna, and Ron Jeremy. Also, remember to buy coffee from girls in panties to enhance the experince.
Wednesday 03.07.07
Now I know when you hear the cliche name Hung Lo you picture that same ole same ole pornstar. You know the ripped up tan guy, with no body hair, and a 12 inch penis right? Well you’re fucking wrong. Hung Lo is the best thing in porn since vibrator accessory to the ipod.
Hung Lo is the only true, Chinese-speaking male fuck toy who devastates his white female counterparts with his massive 5″ member. With over a billion Chinese people in the world, these girls will do anything to see why the Chinese are so fertile … as long as Hung Lo is up to the task.
Watch the Trailer of this little penis going to town on hot white women
PornoJackass.com
Wednesday 02.14.07
I was going through XBIZ World Magazine and saw an attractive adult model sporting a flirt4free tank top on page 136. If you look closely, you’ll see that it’s Jenny Lee from Beauty & The Geek. This photo was taken at the Video Secrets Anniversary party at the Playboy Mansion. If you’re a fan of this show, please help me confirm if this is in fact the same girl.
At least Megan Hauserman (another Beauty & The Geek contestant) was honest about her work for Playboy. Every time her name popped up, you’d see “Playboy Model” underneath. Hell, it’s something to be proud of. I love her for it!
I just think it’s strange to hide adult modeling if you’re going to agree to be on a mainstream reality tv show. Own up to what you do. Be proud of what you do! After I saw her pic in XBIZ, I also saw Jenny Lee on MTV’s show NEXT. If she’s not a wannabe pornstar, she’s at least a reality tv whore.
Tuesday 01.30.07
GAYVN is being hosted in San Francisco this year. Not only is it in my back yard, but it’s being hosted by none other but Kathy Griffin. *sigh* It’s really too bad she didn’t go lesbo after that asshat stole $$ from her. Anyhoo…
If you’re going to be in town, the GAYVN Awards are on February 24th. The red carpet is being hosted by the fabulous Tim & Roma (of NakedSword). Some of you remember me posting about their fabulous talk show back in the day.
Speaking of NakedSword, they’re hosting the GAYVN Afterparty at the Kink.com Porn Palace. It will include dancers from Falcon Studios and Rascal Video. Chi Chi LaRue will be the dee-jaying for the evening. And clearly you’ll all come to party with muoi. Hellooooo!
Seriously. Don’t snooze on this one. It will be a night to remember. I’m going to start the evening off by trying to bang Kathy and end it dancing with the hottest gay boys ever. It’ll be just like prom!
