That’s right, folks. I’d like to take a brief moment to review some of the most awesome (the worst, really) possible sex. You know sometimes the best porn is the type you can pass around to your friends and scream “eww” over. If you can add to our list, please do so in the comments section. You don’t have to admit that you did it, as you’re amongst friends here. I’ll add video examples, for your viewing pleasure.

Scary Rad Sex (in no mother fucking order)…

1. Messy Anal and Sharting

2. Tampon Surprise

3. Oops You Have a Dick Too

4. Sharp Teeth on Dick

5. Oops I Got Horny & Fucked a Rubber Chicken

6. Oops I found Jesus after this Hardcore Scene

7. Oh snap, you put our sex tape on the internet!

8. Eating Your Own Jizz is Kinda Nasty

9. Cum Shot in Eye aka Pink Eye

10. Pornstar Bloopers During Shoot aka Outtakes

11. Drunk Chicks Barfing During Sex

12. Homeless People Sex

I’m so wet for Burning Angel. They did a punk rock porno version of The Exorcist called THE XXXORCIST!

Loves it. Father Merkin does a goddamn “sexorcism” on the crazy slut with the twirly head. This movie is perfect for horror fans like me. Watch the Quicktime trailer here. You can thank your favorite lesbian l8r. ; )

I love strange and artistic porn the best. When I came across this weird dildo monster set, I had to share with the class. You’d be surprised to know that this didn’t come out of Japan.

If Doctor Who had made porn, this would be it. “Exterminate Virginity! Exterminate Virginity!!”

Honestly, I’m not sure whether to be scared…watch more monster dildo movies in horror…or search toy stores for a “dildo monster” of my very own.

We’ve all said it. “Yeah I’d brown bag that slut”. Meaning, I’d fuck her, but she’s so ugly I need to cover up her face. Well apparently the brown bag approach really does work. I mean you have to watch out for the paper cuts…but fuck it. If she’s that ugly…and you’re that horny. It’s win win.

Every week I try to bring you guys the hottest girl on the internet, and I’m pretty proud of how well I do it. I mean, I beat to my own post. Actually, when writing, if I don’t beat to it, then I’m not going to post it. I wouldn’t want to do you that disservice. We’re here to keep you whacking. Well, on most days, that is. All is relatively slow in the hot girl world today. I haven’t seen many new chicks that I should alert you about, so instead, I’m bringing you some ugly ones. Why? Think of it as training. We can’t all go home with the hottest chicks, so you have to prepare for the ugly ones. I don’t want you get the wrong idea here. I’m not giving you atrociously horrendous chicks. Wouldn’t that be fucked up? (and kind of funny for me) No, I’m bringing you chicks that are like, “Damn, you’re ugly. You shouldn’t be ugly, though. Why are you ugly? It doesn’t make sense. Here, let me beat to you and see if you’re ugly. Yep, you’re ugly, but I’d fuck you.” I’ve actually had this happen many times in life. With that said, enjoy the ugos.

When you’ve had enough of the ugos, go here, here and here. Remember: God don’t like ugly.